My life in New York

That's Who You Remind Me Of

2012-01-12T11:01:00.003-05:00

My manager recently quit and moved on. I always felt he would but figured it would be with the company and not to a competitor but that's what he did. And he left us all voice mails on New Year's Day announcing his departure; "I hate to do this over voice mail but effective today..."

It's rumored that he even left a voice mail for his manager, our divisional president. Classy!

The reaction was as you'd expect. Mostly genuine surprise and wondering where he went. But there's also been something else. "I thought he really liked it here." types of comments have been coming to me.

When people would ask me about my manager the description I gave was, in summary, "He's very smart and when you have his attention, you have his complete attention. He's engaging and understands the business. But he's not a team leader. He gives you just enough information to answer your question and give you an idea of what the big picture is but not the full big picture." More information I didn't share was that he never held team meetings, his direct reports never crossed paths, projects or events. He and I would "catch up" for about 30 minutes every two months or so (he worked in another location) and so, for the most part, I was left on my own.

And yet, from time to time, I could see that he was making decisions, plans, connections that would directly affect me without involving me. So while our face to face, one on one meetings/calls were great it became clear that their purpose was to involve me just enough to keep the work moving forward but not me.

So, back to his leaving. I felt I was giving this description more often since he left but something was dawning on me. There was a much better analogy and one that made perfect sense.

He's that dead guy on Law and Order or Castle or The Closer.

He's that guy that fell from a 10th story window or was hit by a car or found in the bathtub surrounded in the mystery of "what the heck happened to this guy."

So they take out his phone or address book going through the long list of names. They talk to his buddies and realize he's got a really active social life. They start calling in people to chat and say "Did you know he was dating allot of people?"

And one by one they all say "He COULDN'T have been dating anyone else. WE WERE IN LOVE!"

One co-worker in particular went on and on during a conference call about how they'd just heard the news and what a tremendous loss this was. This has happened several times this week and you did get this feeling that people felt they'd just been dumped, wondered what went wrong and if, hopefully, he'd take them back.

He's not going to take you back honey because he's moved on to a better place. It's over. Move on.

P.S. my analogy of a dead guy doesn't quite fit with the end but I love the image so much that I don't want to change it. You can get past that, right?

The "Jesus Phone" ?

2011-10-14T11:46:00.000-04:00

My co-worker nearly knocked the mailroom man over in the hallway today searching his cart for the box that would contain her new iPhone 4S. Friends have posted that they're waiting by the door for the UPS/FedEx truck for their new phone. This CNN article's first line was "Apple fans [...] lined up on Friday morning for a chance to buy the iPhone 4S, the latest in the company's line of "Jesus Phones," which includes many under-the-hood improvements."

The company's latest line of Jesus phones??? Never heard this one. According to the Urban Dictionary a Jesus phone is: The iPhone, one of the most hyped products ever and occasionally called the “Jesus phone” like it was the Second Coming.

I'm sure I'm not the first to make this analogy.

Maybe they didn't think it was God. Maybe it was just the next big thing?

This also came to mind:

Kneel before Zod!

The Bad Luck Duck Award

2011-09-16T11:11:00.011-04:00

When I was a teenager, I spent a week each summer at camp which was the highlight of our summer, "our" meaning great for me and great for my family *wink*. As I got a little older, I became a junior counselor and was in charge of some of the younger group of kids and went out on their different activities almost all of which included some amount of daily hiking.

It was a great week that I have so many strong memories of including being the recipient of the Bad Luck Duck award. After one particularly long day hike I came back into camp and in the evening was pretty sure I'd been bitten by some type of bug on my ears. Itchy blisters covered the tops of my ears. Turns out it was no exotic bug bite but good ol' mother nature. I'd been pretty burned by the sun having only worn a baseball cap and having a short hair cut leaving my pretty little ears exposed. My reward was a shout out at the nightly campfire and a box of red vines. Score!

Which brings me back to the present. Last weekend was such a lovely time! The weather was a little cooler but still summer, bugs were a little less and my friend Vicki was in the area doing a quick camping trip and we decided to hang out.

Friday night was camping with all the comforts of home (not) big campfire (thank you Vito) and s'mores (good technique Vicki!).

Saturday we headed up to Mohonk reserve which is one of my favorite spots here in New York as it reminds me so much of California mountains.

Our hike around this particular trail was about 4 miles and pretty easy. True to form, Vito took his time but we always had him in our sites. He INHALED the experience from the views to the weather and the smells. Vicki, Abby and I were able to do a lot of catching up and girl time as we walked the trail and all was well.... until the very end.

I was thinking I wanted to do a second trail a couple of miles up the road but, by the time we were at the end of the trail my feet were really hurting, especially my big toes. Weird. So we decided to call it a day and said our good-byes to Vicki and Abby and headed home.

Four days later my feet feel fine, my big toes did not. Specifically my two tonails. They look swollen and there's pressure. I thought they'd become infected! But a little research on Google and I realized the truth; I'd developed blisters UNDERNEATH my toenails. Apparently this is common to runners who either have poor fitting shoes or lace them up incorrectly. In my case, I think I had worn socks that were to thick and shoes were laced to tight. As we descended my feet were jamming into the front of my boot and circulation wasn't good. By Wednesday night I couldn't sleep because anything on those toes (even the sheet) was hurting. So, in the middle of the night, I got up and using a vice grip, a safety pin and a lighter I performed the procedure most recommened on the web. Making that pin red hot I put a hole in the top of each toenail and popped those blisters underneath. Bye-bye pressure. They're still sore but at least I could wear a proper shoe to work today.

My second Bad Luck Duck award earned but I haven't recieved my box of red vines yet!

Thank You For Your Interest But F**k Off

2011-07-29T11:22:00.009-04:00

We have a "facebook" type of site for use in my company called Neo. It's actually pretty cool and has let me meet a lot more people in the company and get a better idea of who does what etc.

Today I saw a group call "Women in Technology" that I thought would be interesting to join and see what other groups were involved in. Being a media producer which I think falls into the technology portion of the title and a woman (which I'm really good at BTW) I was under the assumption that this was a slam dunk. Here's the response I received.

Thank you for your request to join the group Women in Technology. I'm afraid that we've decided to limit membership to this group so you won't be able to join it for the time being. Please feel free to get in touch with me if you'd like to and I'll try and answer any questions you have about the group.

Sincerely,
Someone better than you (That's my addition)

I LOVE these types of responses that send me right back to high school. Actually, this has more of a grade school feel to it. The feelings coursing through my solar plexus right now are exhilarating. I hope I feel like this all day. Not.

----
Update

I took her up on her offer to request more information:

Hello A******** -

Well, since I’m a woman in technology, I guess I’d be interested to know the purpose of the group.

It might be better if you updated the name of the group to avoid having to send out messages like this to other employees.

Thanks,

Amy

Her quick reply

Hi Amy-

This a group for women working in the PT division of , we tried to be clear in our mission but I can see where it would be confusing. We are a grass roots effort that is just getting off the ground, right now we are offering programming funded by our division and in the infancy stages of development. We do hope to open membership to others in once we get organized. We are just starting small. Thanks for the feedback

A*******

Here's the mission. Lead by example sister!! Lead by example.

W.I.T. (Women in Technology) is a Technology group whose charter is to provide a platform for women to excel in their technical profession by providing resources that educate, empower and inspire. We strive to create an internal forum where people can exchange information on women's issues, participate in community outreach and educational opportunities, both in and in the technology industry.

Of Course They're Watching You

2011-07-06T16:47:00.003-04:00

This was said last weekend. To my face and with all seriousness.

"Yes, I'm sure they can watch us through the television. That's how they spy on us."

Sighhhhhhhh

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"I'm taking an awful risk Vader. This had better work out." That little diddy floats through my mind each time I publish a story about the family.

Vito Does the Darndest Things

2011-03-17T19:25:00.005-04:00

I want to preface this post with the following:

BEGIN

This blog is not about all the funny things the Salvias do. It just seems like that.

END

So, to satisfy the many many people that have been begging me for a new post (Hi Mom) I will tell you how Vito hurt his back.

This is the story of how Vito hurt his back.

Once upon a time there was a fine lookin' Italian man named Vito. Even though Vito was blessed with a wonderful countenance, perfect teeth, a Grecian nose, soft olive skin that rarely burns he still continuously complained about his cold, damp feet. All through the winter no matter how often he washed, no matter how many pair of cheap old cotton socks he wore, Vito's feet would always be cold. Vito's exceptionally loving and patient wife would listen to this over and over and wonder how she could help. She bought him a pair of her favorite SmartWool socks to wear. She thought about the problem. That's about all she did actually.

But one day Vito's exceptionally loving and patient wife read an article about sweaty feat. If you soaked your feet in black tea for twenty minutes a day for a week the tanning process (yes, like cow hides) would start and your feet would stop producing so much moisture. She read the article to her husband and said "We should do this!" Weeks went by with no black tea bags purchased to perform the experiment but Vito's wife would mention it from time to time.

Then one day Vito's wife came home to find Vito soaking his feet in a bucket of water. Wow! He went out and bought tea bags and was performing the experiment himself.

"Oh no," he said. "This isn't tea. This is coffee. I put coffee in this bucket and filled it with some hot water. I'm sure it's just the same."

Vito's patient and loving wife shook her head and went up stairs to change her clothes.

Then something started to happen. Vito was so excited about this experiment! He was laughing and talking about how he wondered if it would work. Again and again he made his brew and soaked his feet. Vito was getting frisky. And loud.

Vito's loving wife came down stairs and made dinner and Vito was jumping all over the place. "My goodness! You have so much energy Vito." "I KNOW!! I feel so strong!"

Vito started chasing his wife around the kitchen. "Hey! Get off me! Vito!! Stop it!" "Oh! I just want to pick you up!" he exclaimed!

Vito's wife ran up stairs with Vito on her tail. "I feel so STRONG!"

Vito held his wife around her waist and with the roar of a lion, or a mother trying to free her trapped child from a burning car, Vito lifted his laughing, with shades of concern, wife over his should and that's when it happened.

Vito cried out. His face turned BRIGHT red. He fell to the floor and stayed there. His wife hovered over and worried and thought "Good Lord I may have killed him."

Never a coffee drinker, Vito was at the mercy of the high that was created from the caffeine sucked up by his feet. It took his wife about a day to realize what had happened. No more coffee foot baths.

Vito still has cold, moist feet and he's decided not to try to black tea soak. The rush of false power is to much for his system. His back hurt pretty bad for about two weeks but he recovered thanks to his wife who gave him lots of massages and love. He never tried to lift her over his shoulder again.

Vito Is a Contender!

2010-12-23T21:39:00.005-05:00

Would love to see some comments for Vito's post. I laugh every time I watch it :-) Love this guy!

For Someone Who Didn't Care .....

2010-12-23T11:56:00.009-05:00

I've always loved Christmas trees but have never, ever purchased a tree since I moved out of my parent's home. It never seemed worth the time and effort since I was going back to California every year anyway. Would the cats climb it? Was I to depressed at being alone to put up a tree. This is probably the most accurate explanation.

So, when Vito and I were together I thought, "Okay, now we'll get a tree for Christmas." Turns out Vito could care less (emphasis on 'less') about a tree. To much effort, waste of money, no big deal. Turns out I still didn't care that much either, at least not enough to put up much of a fuss.

But something was different this year. Our second Christmas together as a married couple? Seeing my brother's beautiful tree? In any case, this year I wanted a tree. "Honey, let's get a tree this year. Not a big deal. I'll make it easy." "Oookaayyy. We'll get a tree." So two weeks ago we headed downtown to the firehouse where all the trees were lined up; any tree, $40. Easy peasy. Or so I though!

I didn't have a big preference; our space is small so it couldn't be to tall, to wide etc. One walk up and down the line and I pointed at one and said, "Sure, that one looks good. Wrap 'er up." But no....

Vito is walking up and down the line with two firemen following him, pulling out various trees for his inspection. Turn it this way and that. Could they stand these three together so Vito could do a comparison. That one had a bare spot it seemed. This one was to short. $40 each you say? Well then, show me the biggest one.

Wait a minute! Wait a minute! Let's not go crazy here.

30 minutes later "we" picked out the perfect tree. The first thing Vito does in the morning it plug in the tree and check to see that it has enough water. He wanted to make sure it was in a spot that we could see from the kitchen and the living room. When the time comes he's going to be very sad to get rid of the tree.

So, it turns out my man found his opinion. Nice :-)

I liked this list.

2010-10-19T09:29:00.002-04:00

It's always interesting to see a complete stranger create of a list of random thoughts you think are unique to you :-) Here's one that was sent to me today

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1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.

5. How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

6. Was learning cursive really necessary?

7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

10. Bad decisions make good stories.

11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.

15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well. (Maytag listened to me!)

19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.

20. I wish Google Maps had an "Avoid Ghetto" routing option

21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the hell was going on when I first saw it.

22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

23. ~~The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.~~

24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?

26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!

27. ~~Shirts get dirty. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.~~

28. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?

29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my all everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!

You've Got to Call Jacobian Myers!

2010-09-15T21:31:00.005-04:00

The feel of autumn is in the air. Nights are getting cooler and my hands down favorite de-stressing tool of choice is now possible; a hot bath. The hotter the better and let my cares sweat away. It was to hot this summer to make full use of it but tonight, ahhhhh. Sweet stress relief. Fill the tub. Get book. Steep until I feel like I'm going to pass out.

So, I've got my head under water and I hear Vito on the phone. That low base travels so well through the water and I notice it's getting louder. He sounds angry or fired up. Who is he talking to? Three guesses. Julie.

So I lift my head out of the cauldron and hear Vito yelling "YOU GOTTA CALL JACOBIAN MYERS! THEY FIGHT FOR THE LITTLE GUY!!!"

What in the world is going on this time? Can I not have complete peace in my moment of de-stressing? Fifteen minutes is all I ask (It's all I can stand in that heat!).

I plug my nose and stick my entire head under water and listen to the muffled voice of my usually quiet husband. Whatever is going on, I'm not the least bit interested until I'm done with my bath.

To be continued.....

A Handy Tip for Burns, the Minor Variety

2010-06-28T16:28:00.002-04:00

On Sunday I was cooking on the stove top, boiling a pot of water. The pan I wanted was sitting behind the pot and I didn't realize that the steel handle had been inches away from the flame in front. As I reached for it I pressed the handle with the side of my thumb and quickly, very very quickly, was running for the sink as I ran my poor skin under the cold water. OUCH!!!! I'm hollering away, Vito comes running in and grabs the pan with a towel and puts it in the sink (I don't know why...) but the water ran onto the handle and bubbled and steamed away. It was VERY hot. I knew this was going to leave a mark. So I ran it under the water for about five minutes and then switched to hold a can of coke against it for about an hour. Each time I took the can away, the sting/pain of that burn was intense! There had to be a better way to soothe this and there WAS!! a little research on line directed me to essential lavender oil and vitamin E. I applied both to my skin, wrapped it with some loose gauze and waited. Stinngggg yes but only for about 10 minutes and then... it went away. Completely. Utterly. I was even able to take a shower later that night without any burning feeling. The skin has a deep but small blister, not close to the top of the skin, and the rest is red and feels a little "flat" or to smooth but no pain.

Buy some Lavender oil and Vitamin E and keep them in the medicine cabinet. I'll use this remedy again because we all know I'm gonna hang on to a hot handle again...

Our Little Oasis

2010-06-24T19:26:00.003-04:00

Just a view of my little garden. My neighbors let my have free reign of their portion of the yard as well. Very nice!

**** All names changed to protect me.

2010-06-17T08:28:00.002-04:00

Julie called last night at 9:30. "What time are you leaving tomorrow?" RED FLAG. Do not answer this question!!

It's Vito's birthday this weekend and we're having a BBQ up at his mother's house. We're leaving right after I finish work. And after I bake the cake. And pack. It's a busy time at work right now and I'm tired but looking forward to his birthday and, hopefully, a drama free weekend. I have no idea when we're leaving.

Turns out Julie wants us to stop by the house and pick up Kelly and take her to the party.

"Noooo." he says. "I don't want to do that Julie. Why can't you bring her?"

"You know I can't go the house!"

Julie has, for the fourth time, left her husband and this time, she got a restraining order. WHAT!? A restraining order? Good Lord.

"Well, okay. So have Mike bring her over to the house."
"He can't." pause "Why can't you do this? You're going past the house anyway!"

Technically the house is about 20 minutes out of the way and it's never just picking someone up.

"Julie, why can't Mike bring her?"
"He just can't."
"Why!"
"Because I had him arrested!!"

That's when I turn my head and say "Oh good Lord."

"Is that Amy? I heard 'Oh good Lord.' "

For the next several minutes I hear the transition from a general question asked in a mild manner to the volume of her voice rising as she switches tactics to a more manipulative tone. She explains that Mike made her feel uncomfortable and that he violated the restraining order by coming to close to her and so she had him arrested.

After five minutes of Vito saying he doesn't want to and Julie getting more and more angry, demanding and loud I finally ask for the phone.

"Julie, listen, I don't know what time we're leaving. I have to work until at least 5 and then I have to pack and bake a cake for the party so..."

"Fine. Thank you! THANK YOU!! FUCK you! FUCK your party" Click.

Hum..

I turned to Vito and said "We don't have to pick up Kelly tomorrow."

Crying Baby on a Plane

2010-03-16T14:21:00.001-04:00

I've laughed and laughed about this today. Now you can too.

Ham and Bean Soup ala Amy Salvia

2010-02-24T22:39:00.010-05:00

Okay, here it is for the three of you who've asked. I LOVE this soup and it's so easy to make!

4 cans** of Great Northern Beans or Small White beans, drained. You'll add three and puree 1 can.

2-3 ham hocks; My grocery store sells these in packs of three. Don't get grossed out by them as you're using them for flavor. They'll get tossed at the end.

2 cups of diced ham; I buy two ham steaks and chop them up but you can use left over if you have or ask your deli if they have any ham "ends" which they'll sell you by the pound. (They do this with cheese to in case you're curious)

1 cup finely chopped carrots (I use a mini-prep Cuisinart)

1 large onion; diced

1 can of diced tomatoes; I use the kind with garlic and onions and no salt

7-8 cups of chicken broth

Olive Oil

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In a large soup pot, saute your onion in about 2 TB of olive oil for 3-4 minutes.

Add your chopped carrots and saute 5 minutes more.

While the carrots cook, take the fourth can of beans and puree them in a blender or Cuisinart and set aside. Again, I use my mini-prep Cuisinart which I use A LOT! Get yourself one if you haven't already.

Add the ham hocks making sure the touch the bottom of the pan and let them heat up a bit (3-4 minutes).

Add your chicken stock, 3 cans of beans, chopped ham, and pureed beans. Don't worry if adding the puree makes it look "chunky". They dissolve during the simmer and give your soup a nice color and creamy taste.

Bring to a low boil and then turn the heat to low and simmer for about an hour or two to bring out all the flavor in the ham hocks.

At the end of simmering, discard the ham hocks. If the hocks are meaty, pull off the ham and add to the soup (not the skin) and then discard.

Add the can of tomatoes.

Season with salt and pepper. I usually add a couple of dashes of green Tabasco for a little tang.

This is delicious served with hot corn bread!

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Options: You can add any other vegetables you like to this soup. If you have fresh spinach, chop some up and add a the very end. I like to keep it simple.

**I make my own beans but I don't suppose that you'd care to do the same. If you do, let me know and I'll tell you how I do that.

A Stubborn Gas Pump

2010-02-02T15:36:00.002-05:00

I'm headed to Boston today. Me and Vito in a rental car, needing gas. Stop at the Mobile station, pump gas, request receipt. Nothing.

So I walk back inside.

"Pump #8 wouldn't give me a receipt."
"Did you yell at it?"
"Well, I gave it a stern look."
"You've got to yell at it."

Next time pump #8. Next time....

Wikipedia - damn you!

2009-12-30T09:55:00.001-05:00

Is anyone else constantly sidetracked by having to look up facts and information because you just have to know? Know right then and there? I am. Constantly.

All Words Followed by "Of the Day"

2009-09-20T21:10:00.010-04:00

Site: The view of NYC from the Whitestone bridge. Perfect! Wonderful!

Smell: Halifax airport. Coming off into customs they have a lovely waterfall and I think they're pumping in sea air or something because it smelled like a cool beach evening when I came off the plane. Very nice.

Word: Craptacular. Listening to NPR on my wait to LaGuardia I heard this word used about the economy. Spectacularly Crappy = Craptacular. This is a great word!

Bummer: The three hour wait in Boston for my connecting flight.

Phrase: "Inspired by the depths of human ignorance." This was in reference to the development of a scientific theory.

Sorrow: Kissing Vito goodbye for four days.

View: Flying over New York and Boston and seeing scores of boats; sail, speed, and barges going in every direction, or standing still as little white dots on the water. It seemed like little comets or shooting stars with their tails blowing out behind them. Beautiful!

Story: Last night Vito and I woke up about 4:00 and were talking about whatever people talk about at 4:00 in the morning.

"Me and Pasqualli were talking the other day about the world and he told me, 'Vito, I know how to get world peace. Where everyone loved everyone else and they all work together and there is no war.' Amy, do you know what his idea was?"

I had no idea. What would it be that brings us all together. What could Pasqualli have thought of?

"This is what he said Amy."

Pause

"If little green aliens came down to earth and started eating humans for food you can bet we'd stop fighting amongst ourselves. AND, if the aliens declared that God had put people on the earth as food for them, then that would be something."

That's some idea. How do we test it?

Really??

2009-08-11T10:48:00.003-04:00

I stopped at my favorite bagel place in Chester this morning for my usual. The girl behind the counter has one of those smiles that lights up her whole face. It's a bit distracting really and I analyze it each time I'm there. I have a feeling that her smile opens a lot of doors for her. So, while I'm analyzing this cute young thing, another distraction pops up behind me. A woman with some type of Brooklyn, perhaps Staten Island, accent on her cell phone getting the order. "Yeah, bagel with...blah blah blah." To the girl behind the counter I hear "regular coffee with half and half and sugar." and this is where I stop analyzing the cute young thing and turn to analyze the nicely put together, but no to bright, middle aged thing next to me.

Waitress - "You get the coffee over there from the coffee bar."
Woman - "I don't know how to make coffee."

All of my attention is now on her.

I glance over my shoulder at the coffee bar; Regular, decaf, hazelnut, vanilla, cups, sugar, stir sticks, milk. Yep. All the fixin's for a cup of coffee.

I look at the woman standing next to me and say, with a smile, "You just have to pour it."

Turning back to the cute young thing for my bagel I get a smile AND a knowing look. Have fun honey!

Yer Sterotypical New York Moment (written with a New York attitude)

2009-06-30T10:58:00.008-04:00

I actually don't see a lot of these in Orange county but was treated to one on Sunday afternoon. Vito and I were walking out of Shoprite back to the car. Very busy shopping day as we're the only supermarket serving 3 or 4 surrounding towns. Parking is pretty adequate but the closer spots are always a premium for those poor souls that can't drag their fat asses to the door. As we walked up our row there was a bit of a jam as one car backed out and another had their blinker on to slide in. And then... as the car pulls away an SUV comes past us, hesitates just a bit and then guns it into the empty spot leaving the waiting car sitting there with their blinker still on. This is where the fun really begins.

The horn starts, the waiting car pulls up a bit and a feisty Latina woman starts YELLING. I love a Latin accent :-) The woman in the SUV appears to be Italian (with her two little kids) is about 100lbs with the perfect hair and nails and the SUV that's to big for her needs, yells back. I state what I perceive to be their nationalities because these are the feistiest type of women I know. I couldn’t see two white women pulling this off.

Our feisty Latina will be named Yesenia because I hear Yesenisa’s voice when I read this back to myself and it makes me laugh. Our petite Italian will be named Antonia

Yesenia: "Hey! That was my spot. I was waiting for that spot!"
Antonia: "Sorry." (with an "oh well" tone) and starts to GET OUT!! Foolish, foolish woman.
Yesenia: Jumps out of her car and really pours on the attitude. Pointing, hips swinging and volume up up up! "That was my space! I had my blinker on! You knew I was waiting for that space!"
Antonia: "I didn't see you!"
Yesenia: "You didn't see me?? That truck pulling out was blocking your view but you saw me when they pulled away. You looked right at me. That's MY SPACE!"
Stupid White Girl (just to make things more fun): "She was waiting for that space. We saw her." That really adds fuel to the fire.
Antonia: "She can find another spot. I was on line for that spot too."
Yesenia: "NO YOU WEREN'T!"

There's a small lull as Antonia refuses to back down. However, she also refuses to get out of her car. Clearly she's waiting for Yesenia to move along, go about her own business, find another spot. Foolish, foolish woman!

Yesenia: "YOU ARE A BITCH! A TOTAL BITCH!" as she throws her finger at Antonia like a magician throws a wand.

Yesenia, twice the fighter of Antonia gets back into her car and, with tires screeching, pulls up behind the Italian's car.

Yesenia: "You can go shopping but I'M GOING TO STAY RIGHT HERE. YOU'LL BE IN THIS FUCKING PARKING LOT ALL FUCKING DAY LADY! I'M GOING TO CALL THE COPS!"

At this point I'm starting to think Yesenia isn't really thinking this through because it's looking like Antonia might have more of a claim of harassment than for a stolen parking space. But the blood is racing in both of these creatures. There's another pause and just like on National Geographic, the weaker opponent backs down. Antonia says she'll move.

Yesenia: "THANK YOU! That's what you should have done in the first place."

I love it that she said thank you. All is well :-) Now, keep in mind that Vito and I were parked just two spots away and would gladly have given it to Yesenia but.... that's not winning and she is a winner!

So we drive out of the lot. I notice in my review mirror that Antonia has decided rather than run into this woman in the store, she'll just leave altogether.

It was a GREAT New York cat fight!

Lessons Heard at a Funeral

2009-05-16T16:38:00.006-04:00

Yesterday I attended the funeral of a friend, Michele Cooper and it was one of the nicest funerals I'd ever attended. She touched many more lives than I'd ever realized. As her husband and children eulogized her, I came away with a couple of lessons.

1. You only get to complain once.
Alan, her husband, talk about how Michele always said you only get to complain once. Complain a second time and you have two choices; fix it or resolve yourself to it. Complain a third time an now you're just whining and Michele didn't like a whiner.

2. Ovarian cancer is a silent killer. By the time you're diagnosed it's likely to late to cure. Michele had no idea she was sick. Had no symptoms of the fist sized tumor that was attached to her ovary and navel. Her daughter Nicole admonished all of us to make ourselves familiar with the subtle signs and symptoms and then get screened. You can find a list of those here at www.ovarian.org/

3. She found more joy in giving than in receiving. Many of the gifts that had been given to her over the years were found in the attic unused. She enjoyed thinking of the perfect gift for another person or filling a need of service. She was child advocate and took great pride in helping children in need.

There were lots of stories about her sense of humor which I certainly always enjoyed. She had a dry and quick wit and always gave an honest opinion and advice. She'll be missed.

The Various Stages of Spring

2009-05-02T12:08:00.007-04:00

It's amazing what 60 miles in a particular direction can make in a New York spring season. Last week we had a bit of heat wave and all of the trees and bushes at my house burst open in flowers and leaves. I planted my 1 tomato plant (sweet 100s) in a bucket, 3 strawberry plants in an old copper tub (small one) and several pansy, snapdragon and petunia plants. My peonies, after three years in the ground, are finally going to flower this year as I see the little pink buds on the ends of the branches. All of my phlox is in full bloom and my two little delphinium plants came back after I thought I'd killed them last year. My little piece of earth is over crowded with plants but I don't have the heart to pull anything up yet.

Drive 60 miles in the other direction to Esther's house on Long Island and the blooms on the trees have come and gone. We had to trim the bushes back last week and the lawn has been mowed several times. Her perennials (hyacinth) are large and smell so sweet. All different shades of pink. For some reason, green onions are a weed in New York and Ester doesn't fertilize her yard so every time you mow, it smells like onions. It's such an odd thing to me! But I find them popping up in my garden too.

Travel 60 miles west to Roscoe and.... what a difference! The leaves have just started coming out on many trees but there are some with no leaves whatsoever yet! The hearty daffodils have taken over the yard so I guess they'll catch up to Chester in a week or two. I had big plans for this half acre lot this year but Annette's pesky neighbor had his land surveyed last week and all the areas I had plans for (the borders) fell into his land and he won't be appreciative of my efforts. Good thing I hadn't purchased the plants yet! So, I'll have to rethink the space and do something else. Annette is a total dear for letting me play with her yard!

So, here I am in Roscoe. Last weekend I was wearing a tank top and this weekend I'm wearing a sweater.

Bonjour Mes Amies! Je suis rentré de Paris!

2009-04-18T11:48:00.016-04:00

Our trip to Paris was wonderful! We had exceptionally warm and sunny weather for April and spent most of our vacation outside. Below are some pictures. Additional pictures can be found here.

DAY 1

We arrived on Easter morning and made it to Notre Dame Cathedral just in time to observe mass being said.

We were all EXHAUSTED and after mass we grabbed a sandwich and headed to the park where Vito promptly fell asleep on my shoulder.

DAY 2
I almost can't remember what we did.... Oh yeah, the Eiffel Tower! We navigated our way to the other side of town and found ourselves in a mass of tourists!!! Huh?? What's going on? So, the line was hours long so we opted to walk around the bottom of the tower and bask in it's magnificence. The fact that Cecilia has a tremendous fear of heights also helped us make the decision :-) Parked outside the tower is the "Paris On Tour" bus. One of those double decker, "I want to sit on top", buses that I would NEVER dane to be on because.. come on. Those are for tourists. However, I'm easily talked into almost anything so 15 mintues later I found myself riding ON THE TOP of the Paris On Tour bus being driven around Paris rather than walking which turned out to be great!

DAY 3
We hung out on the bus again (2 day pass) and eventually found my friends Donna and Kierra Jordan who were also vacationing in Paris for the week! The boys tried duck for the first time (Yum!) and we saw a man sleeping in garbage which is an image that Vito can't get out of his head. Desperation exists in all countries; even one as beautiful as France.

DAY 4
This was our only visit to a museum since it had our outdoor theme; The Rodin. And it was the day for our excursion to the Palace of Versailles where King Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette were dragged kicking and screaming from their beds by an angry French mob. But before that happened, they built a truly magnificent castle with phenomenal park with gorgeous trees and a pool that stretches for the entire length of the estate and which you take take out a row boat on (I wish we'd done that). We spent the afternoon walking in the park. Again, there were crowds and crowds of tourists so we didn't go into the estate this time (I've seen it. It's okay.)

Miscellaneous
How many books do I have in my house that I haven't started or finished? A few. Usually one of these comes with my on a trip and I thought, in honor of Paris and France, I chose "The Three Musketeers" that my brother had recommended to me some time ago. At 700 pages, it's a good travel paperback because I certainly won't finish it on the trip (that's the worst. What will I read now??) and it was having trouble getting into it. Perfect.

At the end of the trip... I'm 350 pages into the book and loving it. Excellent!

Gifts
Yours isn't coming. Sorry!

Overheard at the Shoprite

2009-04-02T22:42:00.003-04:00

A woman was picking a bag of Granny Smith apples. The man next to her said "When do those turn red?" Wow.

An excerpt from a Capt. Sullenberger Article

2009-03-29T11:20:00.002-04:00

I really enjoyed this article and especially this excerpt:

[...] we followed our training. [...] We never gave up. Having a plan enabled us to keep our hope alive. Perhaps in a similar fashion, people who are in their own personal crises - a pink slip, a foreclosure - can be reminded that no matter how dire the circumstance, or how little time you have to deal with it, further action is always possible. There's always a way out of even the tightest spot. You can survive.

Maple Syrup.... mmmmmmmm

2009-03-21T20:54:00.002-04:00

The sap is running fast and furious in New York and maple syrup is running through the streets of Delhi. Today was a open house at Catskill Mountain Maple where they serve all you can eat pancakes with fresh, from the tap, still warm maple syrup. The owner, Tom, is Joe's (Vito's brother) boss at the college and gave us the grand tour of the facility. It's quite an operation. Tom has a forest of 1500 trees that are all connected to each other with tubing from tap to tap to tap and ends up in the sap collection room. A 1200 gallon tank can fill with sap from these trees in about 3 hours! from there it's pumped into a reverse osmosis machine that takes out about 65% of the water and then it flows into the boiler which looks like a train engine with maple steam flowing out the top. Driving up to the building you can smell the boiling sap and inside it's a warm and gooey smell.

The kitchen to the side is where they bottle the finished syrup and grade it into three categories; Light, Medium and Dark Amber. They never know what category the syrup will come out as it is all dependent on the weather. Last night for example was quite cold and the sap was running a little slower and came out cloudy. It's likely that today's batch will turn out to be dark amber, perhaps medium but certainly not light, the best type for syrup. The dark is typically used for baking or candy/sugar making.

The kitchen was also used to make all the maple cream and candies. Dozens of candy forms in the shapes of maple leaves, buttons, stars will filled with the cooked maple syrup. Cook it some more and you'll get pure maple sugar.

It was quite an experience and very interesting to watch. I don't have much of a sweet tooth so the free sample was plenty for me but we can always use a jug of fresh, made that day, maple syrup from New York!

Acting on the impulse to scold

2009-03-03T09:14:00.002-05:00

Even though the east coast routinely is accosted by winter storms, we still seem to panic a bit and race to the grocery store. Of course, I don't do that. I just happened to need to go to the store on the Sunday before out latest winter weather hit on Monday. True to form, Shoprite was packed and I said to Vito, "in and out in less than 15 minutes if possible."

So, we're winding our way to a specific aisle when two pre-teens come tearing around a corner with an empty cart chasing each other. They see nothing around them and nearly miss clocking us. I'm irritated. Where is their parent? Don't know. Shake my head. Move on.

We're in the next aisle and I can hear the two boys yelling at each other. Laughing. They're having a great time but unfortunately, they chose to cross my path again and the kid without the cart comes running down my aisle and I don't care. "Hey!" Of course he doesn't see or hear me. So I stepped in front of him and said again "Hey!" Finally, eye contact. "You kids need to stop running around the store now." It's not me it's him.... "It's both of you. I can hear you from hear. Knock it off. (stern voice, no bullshit)." We both walk away from each other and one last shout out from me "Go stand next to your parent."

At this point I have to say that these kids probably were okay kids just running amuck because I got no lip what so ever. Today's kids seem to give it right back to you and top it all off with cursing etc. Not from this one and as I made my way through the store, I saw him again, with his brother, standing next to his parent.

My Little Friend

2009-02-16T21:15:00.007-05:00

I have a little friend I talk to when I'm in the bathroom. My friend can be your friend. His name is Fred and he's a fly. When I bought my house in 2005 I did a lot of work on the place and that included painting every square inch of wall space with at least two coats of paint. The little bathroom downstairs got some special treatment as I experimented with different finishes. The little bathroom is small, dark and cool and Fred came in and found a brief respite. Until it became his prison, his hell and eventually, his burial plot.

R.I.P. Fred. R.I.P

What a Great Dream!

2009-02-06T17:05:00.006-05:00

Last night I was on stage with four other girls waiting for Simon Cowell to choose who was going to move forward in American Idol (yes, I watch it but not religiously). Next to me was standing my roommate, Katherine Heigl, and we're all certain that he's going to pick her. He slowly walks in front of us saying nothing, just looking. Then he's standing in front of me and I'm waiting for the words "It's the end of the line for you." but instead, he tweaks my boob and says, "You're going to Hollywood!" The crowd yells! I cover my face like a newly crowned Miss America and step forward to claim my glory. It's unbelievable! I look back at Katherine thinking "I'm sorry! It should have been you!" but she'll hear none of it. She's really upset. I'm thinking "How could I win wearing THIS? Old jeans and a Kohl's crappy sweater. I'm over the age limit. I look like a dumpy mother. Damn! I must be really good."

At home I find my father in the garage (he's died in '94) and I tell him about it. He points to the television (he never speaks in my dreams) showing me that he has the show on and there I am on the group day singing Amazing Grace. Yep, I'm good. It sounds great.

Very fun dream!

You Can't Force It.......

2009-02-03T22:35:00.002-05:00

The other night I was in the kitchen taking to a friend discussing ... everything but it came down to life is a puzzle and the pieces you think are going to be the perfect fit aren't and you have to adjust. On the surface the missing piece looks clear but when you try and fit it all together, it just doesn't fit and no matter how you turn it, flip it, analyze it, it's just not the right fit. Forcing it doesn't work.

I've got a couple of pieces like that right now in my life and it's irritating, frustrating, and .. puzzling. Has this analogy worn out it's welcome?

A story for Cat lovers

2009-01-31T13:49:00.003-05:00

I don't think the rest of you will think this is as funny as I did. Last night some of Vito's family came and stayed the night and at some point someone closed the bathroom door after they left leaving the cats cut off from their litter box. In the morning Vito opened the door to two anxiously waiting kittens who marched into the bathroom and got in line for their turn. First Allie with Rosie sitting patiently behind here. After Lilly, Rosie's turn and both cats went back to bed.

I feel yucky talking about urinating cats but the image was quite funny and I'm very glad they're patient and didn't pee on the carpet!

Reasons to Laugh out Loud - My Favorite Monster.com Commercials

2009-01-22T02:07:00.003-05:00

Plus a shout out to Tide

I'm a little pissed off....

2009-01-21T05:59:00.002-05:00

THREE shows that I watch (TiVO) regularly have been canceled. I don't understand network television and why, just as you're really getting tied up into a show, they cancel it. I'm really going to miss Pushing Daisies, Eli Stone and Dirty Sexy Money. I love TV and I hate it. Mostly I hate it right now. They cancel Raines, Fire Fly which I LOVED, a host of others and now these. This entire "appeal to the masses" mentality that ultimately dumbs down people in so many aspects of life is really irritating. If it weren't included in my association fees, I might seriously consider canceling. Or I might somewhat consider canceling. It's possible I'd just blog about canceling.

Thankful Thursday (a nod to Alison!)

2009-01-08T20:44:00.002-05:00

Alison started this a few weeks ago and while I won't do it every week, today seemed appropriate.

I have a friend from high school that I've thought of only occasionally and mostly because we was one of the original Power Rangers (blue) and I've always thought that was cool. But today I realize what a good person he is and that I'm thankful I know him. And how did we reconnect? Facebook of course. (another shout to Alison for bugging me to get an account.) My friend wrote me the kindest note when he accepted my friend invitation. Personal, thoughtful and very kind. Last week was his birthday and again, he wrote and nice note for my note (when do you stop saying "No, after you?") with not just a "thanks for remembering me!" but included a memory and was personal. I read some of his other posts and he is so kind to everyone.

It made me really think back to high school which is something I don't often do as it was a very unhappy, awkward time. But looking back I see that even then he was kind to everyone and I have a lot of fun memories of David and me in the back of English class chatting away. He was a bright space in my day. He made it easy to feel comfortable and open. He makes people feel special. I'm grateful to know him.

A day that will live in infamy...

2008-12-31T08:49:00.005-05:00

I'm getting married :-) It doesn't feel the same as it would have when I was young and that's a good thing! I love you Vito!

Overheard over the last three days...

2008-12-27T23:14:00.006-05:00

Day 1
J: Hey! Guess who I saw the other day? Brenda! Remember Brenda? She's a good looking woman!
S: Really! Does she have all her teeth?
J: Yep. All her teeth.

Day 2
A: Ugh. I don't want to touch this pork roast.
E: Why? Are you like the Jews?
A: Huh? The Jews?
E: Yeah, you know, they get a piece of pork in their wagon and have to throw it out.
A: Um, no. I just don't want to get my hands dirty again.

Day 2, evening
C: I've been waking up with these terrible headaches and I feel congested.
V: Maybe you're being adopted by aliens in the night.
C: You mean abducted? I don't think so.

Day 3
S: ... so I spent an hour in the dr. office today and he pulled out this huge black stone thing from my ear. You know, when you're in the shower and you stick your finger in your ear and then smell it? Well mine really smelled and that's how I knew something was wrong.

What I see on TV doens't affect ME!!

2008-12-11T21:51:00.013-05:00

Last year I saw Kate Walsh gush and thrill and go on and on about her new love and was surprised when I heard she married this love of her life. It unnerved me somewhat as I did not (and do not) feel this intense emotion in my relationship with Vito. Very often it worries me that I don't have these emotions when I look at my love. In college I had a boyfriend that I was obsessed with, that I could not stop thinking of and when we (ha! HE) broke up it took me years to get over it. This is not right I know and I never wanted to duplicate this experience but I did think that I would FEEL more. It should also be mentioned that I rarely feel much about anything. I'm pretty "blah" in my highs. The lows can still go pretty deep but the highs rarely reach above a deep contentment or gratitude. Excitement is rare. Dennis Prager classifies this as a borring person so I hope he and I aren't sitting together at dinner anytime soon. Annyyywayyy....

So, I read Kate Walsh's story and thought that perhpas I was faking it with Vito. Maybe I didn't really care about him as much as I should or I'd feel more. Enter the reason for today's entry. After 15 months of wedded bliss, Kate Walsh and her husband are getting divorced.

Good heavens! Irreconcilable differences? Turns out they were caught up in the heat. Give me a friggin' break. I can't believe I used this example as a sounding board for my own relationship.

Vito is the kindest, sweetest, most handsome man I ever known. He has such wisdom. He holds me tight and tells me everything is going to be alright. He makes the bed and cleans the kitchen. He's kind to his mother and siblings and always looks for the good in other people. He's generous as well as thrifty. A talented painter (the house variety) and he likes my cats.

Screw the television. I love Vito!

When it's this funny, you must share with friends

2008-12-10T11:30:00.004-05:00

I'm not bashing men so don't get all pissy if you feel that way. Vito bought me a car battery last year and I wasn't upset. Truly. I like being looked out for because I have sat on the side of the road for hours, by myself, waiting for AAA but I did think this was very funny and well done. Enjoy.

Catholic Mass is Funny

2008-11-23T11:03:00.004-05:00

I attended mass with Vito's family this morning. The church itself is beautiful. Very large (as all Catholic churches should be!) and perfectly round with wood beam ceilings and stained glass depicting events. They have a cantor that's as gay as a blade and sings all puckered up like he's just eaten a lemon. What a show. At the end of the service the priest asked us to stay seated while they read the annoucements. And this is when I laughed out loud (but only Vito realized it).

They've just taken the eucharist, the literal blood and body of Christ. They've prayed. They've reminded themselves of their great obligation to the Lord. But the announcements come very last because THIS is important! This is what you should remember as you're leaving the church.

"Please remember that today is your last day to purchase your tickets for the 50/50 raffle drawing. You can get these at the back of the church as you exit. Have a wonderful week."

It makes laugh in the same way that the gift shop in Notre Dame Cathedral makes me laugh. You either get this or you don't.

Please be generous and have a great week!

Artie Lange describes me better than I could...

2008-11-19T10:17:00.006-05:00

... except without the drugs, alcohol, suicide attempt, or money. However, his description of the boredom he experiences feels familiar to me. The interview is very funny and I laughed out loud many times. Is it coincidence that he's going to be in this neighborhood tonight? I'd never even heard of him before today and just picked a random Fresh Air episode to listen to. Maybe I'll head over to his book signing tonight just for kicks.

To Fat to Fish by Artie Lange

Joan Didion on grief

2008-11-10T19:48:00.005-05:00

This weekend I finished reading Joan Didion's book, The Year of Magical Thinking about the year after her husband died (her daughter dies a year later from a long illness). The book is focus on her life but also a study on grief as she turns to books to understand her presumably irrational feelings.

Life changes fast
Life changes in the instant.
You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends.

About a year ago a colleague collapsed at work and died three days later. He was 41. He'd had a stroke. The next week I heard Joan Didion interviewed on NPR and was intrigued by her story. The book is very powerful and I've allowed myself to think about it openly. Meaning, I haven't shied away from it because of the feeling "If you think about a loved one dying, they will." that always follows.

It was an excellent book and it makes me wonder how I will handle my own year of magical thinking when it inevitably arrives one day.

I love a straight talker!

2008-11-07T07:40:00.003-05:00

I don't know how to put into words why I like this clip so much. It's great to hear someone call it like it is. But she's talking to people that were advising a man that may have been our president. These were the people that McCain picked to give him advice. I keep wondering how the election would have turned out if Mitt Romney had been chosen as the Republican candidate and I think it would have been a Republican victory as Romney is just as gifted a speaker as Obama and has the report card to back him. It would have been a much more interesting race as I think my choice would have been much harder to make.

Is one of us supposed to be a dog in this story?? Yes. I am the dog.

2008-10-28T09:44:00.010-04:00

Do you remember this exchange in "When Harry Met Sally" ?

Harry: You know how a year to a person is like seven years to a dog?
Sally: Is one of us supposed to be a DOG in this scenario?
Harry: Yes.
Sally: Who is the dog?
Harry: You are.
Sally: I am? I am the dog? I am the dog?

There is a scenario in my life where I am the dog. Last month Vito watched a program on NatGO about REALLY obese people; 750lb people, and it freaked him out. Mind you, he has a 32 inch waist. His father never had more than a 36 inch waist. His whole family has a metabolism that people would pay money for if it could be bottled and put on a shelf. But Vito saw these poor people, one of whom needed the help of two people just to roll over in bed, and announced "I'm going to start running." That was four or five weeks ago. He's dropped 10 pounds. Geeze.

At the same time, my neighbor is walking for an hour each day. Faith (the neighbor who knows everyone and everything) tells me that she takes her dog Jinx (begal/Rottweiler mix. Great looking dog!) for a walk first taking her time and letting him do all his dog things. Then she puts him away and takes her own walk.

One of the great qualities about Vito is that he's very supportive in a non-irritating way. Non-patronizing. Non-I want to slap you. He suggests I go with him. Oh boy. But Vito makes me feel so good about myself that I know no matter what my performance, it will be good. So I put on my sneakers and set off. He let's me run slightly ahead of him, not in front. He stops when I get winded and we don't go very long at this point (I can run/walk about a mile before I declare how much I hate it.) But then I realized, he's running on his own at other times of the day. And he runs a little longer (not much) and definitely a little faster.

Then it dawned on me. I'm Jinx. I'm the dog in this story and Vito is my loving trainer. Thank you for all your encouragement honey!

Are you Banana?

2008-10-24T10:21:00.011-04:00

I'm still laughing about this story I was told the other day.

My friend Dave Manchester works for the LDS Church as a building superintendent and drives all over NY, NJ, CT taking care of the various buildings.

Back story; he lives and goes to church in Pompton Plains, NJ and in his congregation is a woman whose name is... Banana. There was absolutely NO information given to me as to WHY this woman is named Banana but there it is and apparently, she has a personality to match her name. She wears pants to church (BIG social no no in LDS world), is loud, a little crass but a gem on the inside. This, by the way, describes most of my non-LDS friends :-) Back to Dave.

Dave is in NYC for the day. The LDS church has a large building across the street from the Metropolitan Opera House and often you'll find parking on the street around that area and then walk through the large square to ... wherever... which is what Dave was doing last week. As he's walking he sees (or thinks he sees) his friend Banana ahead of him. He was quite surprised to see her in the city as he didn't think she would come in during the day. Perhaps she worked there? Going to the church? Anyway, he was excited to recognize a friend and called out her name. "Banana!" She didn't turn around. (You can see where this is going I'm certain). A little louder "Banana!!" Nothing. So, now he runs to catch her before she crosses the street. He's running and shouting "Banana! Banana!" It takes him a full minute to realize that it isn't Banana and stops. As jaded as New Yorkers are to the crazy and weird, many people stopped and stared at him. Wouldn't you?

Why I love Autumn

2008-10-18T18:47:00.006-04:00

Today is a quintessential autumn day as were the last five days before. It's been a wonderful week for weather! Here are several other reasons I love this weather.

1. Cool enough for a sweater but you could probably go without one.
2. The clouds are high and wispy and air smells soft, not crisp as it does in winter but soft and cool.
3. The glorious sunsets that start around 5:00 and fill the sky with brilliant shades of pink and orange.
4. The trees change into the most beautiful colors and, if we're lucky and have no storms, they last for weeks. We've been very lucky this year!
5. There's a feeling of excitement and anticipation with this weather that I think come from childhood; the start of school, Halloween, Christmas, new clothes, new friends. Funny how this feeling never fades!
6. The wonderful smell of a fire burning in the fireplace and the crackle from burning wood.

On a side note, I made a really yummy dinner tonight thanks to Rachel Ray. This dish, with a large salad made a great and healthy dinner. Vito went back three times even though he was dubious of the squash :-)

Butternut Bowties

Trouble with your Kids?? Here's a solution

2008-10-08T15:38:00.002-04:00

Take them to Nebraska!!

In a world going mad, I live on the fringe

2008-09-30T22:10:00.005-04:00

Tonight was very strange for me. I felt like I was slipping away, becoming completly disconnected from everything around me. When Vito leaves and goes back up to Roscoe, that first day is always hard for me and today was no different. Talking to him on the phone is no help as it's his physical presence I miss. The sound of him in the house.

So, I went to the grocery store at 8:00 feeling strange, disconnected and for a minute, I thought perhaps I shouldn't drive as everything looked weird too. My depth perception felt off, everything was moving very fast but the grocery store was kind of a bizzare oasis. There was almost no one there and I felt like I was in a movie. You know, the type of movie where they have 15 workers and 2 customers and everyone sits around staring at each other or picking their toes or something and all the time the music is playing. Shoprite plays some pretty good music. I wandered around in a daze; up and down the aisles picking up this and that. Some cheese (damn it's getting expensive!) loaf of bread, baking powder. I stood still in the middle of the meat department staring at chicken for about 2 minutes while a stock boy and one customer walked past me. Keep in mind this is the only grocery store within an 8 mile radius so it's usually pretty busy. Of course there were the two women who walked briskly up and down the aisles with their little lists and purposeful gaits. "Got to get this done and home 'cause there's so much more to do." While I stare at butter. Hmmm, should I get butter? Hmmm. sure, I'll get some butter.

An hour later I got home with $120 worth of groceries (didn't the same amount cost a lot less last year?). Okay, I didn't really need the Oprah magazine or the Mallomars but at least I didn't go to the store dazed and HUNGRY. I'm not that foolish.

I think this is a funny commercial but....

2008-09-18T16:13:00.003-04:00

I'm still not switching to Vista yet!

Hurrican Ike Strikes!

2008-09-13T09:58:00.003-04:00

Steve and I just got off the phone with each other (10 EST) and so far so good for the relatives in Houston. Much wind but little damage so far. He said that one of his trees fell into the neighbor's driveway and that same neighbor had a tree fall onto the corner of his house. Steve is excited to use his new chain saw I believe :-) He also mentioned that they lost power about 3:00 this morning and he'll hook up his generator to the fridge soon. They have tons of food and water and they'd make his old boy scout master proud at the level of prepardness they've reached for this event.

Tribute to the Voice

2008-09-03T23:32:00.005-04:00

Wow, who is going to take this man's place?

He passed away on Monday :-(

Sarah Palin??? I feel sick.

2008-09-03T21:24:00.008-04:00

An enlightened citizenry is indispensable for the proper functioning of a republic. Self-government is not possible unless the citizens are educated sufficiently to enable them to exercise oversight. It is therefore imperative that the nation see to it that a suitable education be provided for all its citizens. ~~ Thomas Jefferson

Is this really the best person for the job? The MOST Qualified? The BEST hope of getting McCain into the White House? If you were going to pick a woman, why this one? She has no experience. She has a very questionable ethics record.

I'm voting for Obama. He chose a person who could help in those areas that he lacks experience. He's our best chance of getting the U.S. out of this tremendous hole that's been dug by the current administration.

I hate politics.......

Do Women want to be liked or respected?

2008-08-25T21:20:00.003-04:00

Someone posed this to me the other day and I've been thinking about it. It was in the context of business women in the work place. That women would rather be liked than make waves. That they don't see their real value because they want to be liked by those around them; they don't want people to be mad at them. It seem that men (try not to be shocked) are just the opposite and would rather than be respected than liked. In fact, most at the top could care less if people like them.

Almost daily I see this is true for myself and I see how it holds me back because I worry. The little girl inside me cries "Please like me! Don't don't don't be mad at me." I want to be witty and funny and always make the right choices and never ever ever get it wrong. Men all around me make huge mistakes and it doesn't seem to matter on a day to day basis.

It's a balancing act as are most things in life. It fits very nicely with my friend Alison's feelings about motherhood.

Let It Snow! Let Is Snow? In August?? Ohhh, Hail!

2008-08-14T15:10:00.005-04:00

Target Clearnce Shopping With Friends. Who knew????

2008-08-13T12:03:00.001-04:00

.... it could be so fun. I have a group of friends that get together EVERY Friday night and meet at the clearance bins as you walk into Target. From there, armed with coupons, they stroll up and down all the endcaps of all the aisles looking for exceptional deals. Jim, for example, found an entire box of his favorite ginger candy on a clearance endcap. It was unmarked and they ended up giving it to him for $1.99 and it would have cost them over $20 for the entire box so deals are to be had!

I found a couple of items but my favorite was this plastic shrub rake. I'm not using it for shrubs but for ... my carpet. I rake the carpet before I vacuum and get a lot more junk to come up into the vacuum AND the carpets look great. No one would describe me as a fanatic or even competent house keeper but certain things, folding towels and carpets, I like it to be done really well. Additionaly, I've been blessed with a great boy friend who enjoys cleaning the kitchen and he does that very well so... the house doesn't look like a total disaster but it's never going to be like my mother's :-(

Spending Sunday with Friends

2008-08-10T18:07:00.013-04:00

Steven and Tina asked us to go to the Boscobel estate with them today. It's a large Hudson Valley estate overlooking the Hudson River and a clear view of West Point academy where we go often to hear concerts and see fireworks. We pack a picnic lunch where I made FANTASTIC chicken cutlet sandwiches, had apples, M&Ms, potato salad, fresh tomatoes and cokes.

The estate was lovely. There are lots of walking trails, gorgeous views and the weather was very mild.

Here are a couple of other pictures of the day

When you feel dumb....

2008-07-24T21:09:00.007-04:00

I find it useful to search out peers who I feel are smarter than myself and find evidence of this and then ponder over it. For example, today I remembered that my friend John had been invited to testify before Congress about the internet and how to make government information more available to U.S. citizens.

Now I feel not just dumb but incompetent as well and way behind in the achievement areana.

Do you ever think "I'm XX age now. This means I should have achieved a certain level of maturity, knowledge, wisdom etc." But NO ONE has asked ME to testify before Congress about anything. And I'm going to be 40 this year!

Why waste all those words??

2008-07-17T07:41:00.004-04:00

About once a month a friend of mine in Boston composes a lengthy email and sends it out to her many friends as a way of reaching out and checking in. She's good at making little edits for each person to find out about them and is a good example of how to maintain friendships over long distances. I, true to form, don't follow that example but recognize it and feel guilty for about an hour about not doing the same.

Anyway, I replied to her this morning and it was such a long email (for me!) that I thought, why should I waste all these words on just one person? So, for everyone else, I share them with you. What a sorry was to fill a blog :-)

---------------------------------------------------
Good morning Sherrine!

Wow, once again, your life is a total whirlwind. I was thinking about you the other day and just the thought of putting your world in boxes again.... Ugh!

Vito and I spent the 4th down on the Island with his family. John purchased fireworks from "someone" and we went out to the street to set them off and I was so surprised to see/hear the entire neighborhood lighting off fireworks, BIG ones. I kept asking, "Isn't this illegal?" and thinking "When are the cops coming?" which never happened. It was just one big party. thinking about it now I get surprised all over again. Apparently someone was lighting bottle rockets in my neighborhood and the cops were called immediately. Different all over.

I didn't attend the Blazin shower as I had Vito's aunt's 80th bday to attend. In fact there were three other events I would have liked to go to and they were all that weekend. bummer. But I'm sure they put together something beautiful. It's amazing to see Patrick all grown up. Did Laureen Milazzo send you pictures of Josh's wedding day? I'm waiting to hear from the Michel's that Greg has found his special someone. He's a good catch and a sweet kid.

My friend Alison blogged about how her son shared is testimony in sacrament meeting and I said "But he's just a baby!" It's incredible how fast the grown up (He's 10 now :-) and how they change so quickly.

Yesterday I started my "new" job with Prentice Hall. A colleague had left for another publisher and I was approached about taking his place which I happily accepted. So I'm back on the payroll, get to work from home, it's just what I want to be doing and all is well. I never thought I would have been able to make it freelancing as I did but life showed me otherwise and my goal is to plan better so that if I ever find myself suddenly jobless again, I hope I won't panic as much. It was an interesting 18 months.

Phil's 60th bday plan sounds fun. I remember taking Mom to Paris for her's and she still talks about it. If airfare ever becomes more reasonable, maybe she and I will go again some day.

I was in Ridgewood two weeks ago for a Dr. apt and thought about Michelle Cooper. Do you know what's going on with her? I also heard that Joyce was in the hospital at that time and I stopped over there to but she'd already checked out. Dave Manchester wouldn't give me any details. I need to reach out to her again but she reminds me so much of my Grandmother and I'm a little afraid :-) pathetic I know. Anyway, I'd be interested to hear about them if you have any news.

You mentioned Mitt; his he considering (or being considered) for the VP spot? I haven't watched the news much as it's usually to depressing. In fact, when Tim Russert died, I didn't find out for about a day and a half. I was in a meeting and said "Did everyone know...." Ummmm, yeah. They knew.

Well, this is the longest email I've written in months! I'm glad to hear that you're well although very busy and, once again, having to transplant yourself. Let me know when you find an apartment.

Thank you for keeping in touch! You're so good at that.

Ever have a sex dream about a collegue?

2008-06-17T13:58:00.003-04:00

I had one the other night and now I feel funny. I hope I don't stammer when I walk past his office today.

A small moment in a city of chaos

2008-06-03T10:26:00.003-04:00

I was sitting at the Starbucks in LIRR Station on Saturday waiting for Vicki's train to come in from Yaphank. I don't really care for their coffee (why does it always taste burnt?) but they have the most delicious raspberry scones. Yummo!

So, with my tall burnt coffee and my delicious treat I sat at a little table in front and watch the most fascinating death of a pair of gloves. An animator could catch the scene perfectly but I'll have to describe as best I can.

As usual, the station is quite crowded with people coming and going. It's like a flock of birds in the air; packed tightly together, moving quickly but managing to never even brush another person. New Yorker's are exceptional at this skill. You can pack them together like sardines but no one is actually touching another person and certainly NOT looking at another person. It's amazing.

Back to the gloves. A woman in her 20's with a backpack swings by and a small pair of black gloves tumbles out of one of the pockets. They lie on the floor for a second before a man comes by and kicks them with his toe and they scoot forward about ten feet but before resting, they are kicked back to their starting point by a woman rushing by with a red suit case. The original owner of the gloves is long gone by now and I watch as those gloves are kicked forward again by man in a suit carrying his brief case and trying in vain to get a cell phone signal (good luck buddy!). As the gloves come to a rest the only calm person in NY, the street sweeper, walks by with his little broom and dustpan and sweeps up the gloves into the container and, as far as I know, that's the end of the gloves. The whole encounter took no more than 30 seconds to play out and was so smooth you would swear it had been choreographed and I was waiting to hear someone yell "Cut!" but no one did. It was just another mini-moment in New York.

Linked In and Why I Hate it.....

2008-05-27T10:09:00.002-04:00

My inbox after Memorial Day weekend was stuffed with all kinds of stupid stuff and a few work related emails that trickled in from people that haven't yet realized that they do NOT have to sacrifice their holiday weekends for the company.

One of these emails was from LinkedIn and gave me a quick update on some colleague's profiles; how many links had been added, what groups people had joined etc. It's finally dawned on my why I hate this site. It's the Match.com, Eharmony, LDSSingles for jobs. Look through the site and see who has the most contacts, the most impressive resumes. Another site to say, Do You Matter? Are you attractive to anyone. Look at me!! Look at Me!! It makes me sick.

Why does Dr. Oz talk so fast??

2008-04-30T11:03:00.004-04:00

I have XM Radio which I love mostly for the Oprah and Friends shows and Dr. Oz is my favorite. My alarm goes off at 7:00 a.m. to the melodic sound of Dr. Oz speaking so quickly that I don't know who his guest is, what the topic is etc. His lips and tongue are moving so rapidly that I feel like he's going to start speaking like a computer stream.... like that sound you used to hear when your computer was connecting to the internet (remember the dial-up sound!) He's a computer that trying to slow his speech so we non-computers can comprehend his words.

If only his show came on at 8:00 I think I could really get more out of it. Instead the Gayle King show is on which I don't like at all. She speaks with such a little girl affectation and a lisp that must have been cute at one time but is ... not anymore. Her "crush" on Obama is getting a little much too.

What I really want for the Dr. Oz show to be a podcast so I could listen to it when I was a little more awake and sharp. Sitting with a cup of coffee, reading my email and listening to his show would be the perfect start!

My Commuting Adventures - Good for a laugh or two.

2008-04-28T22:15:00.005-04:00

Monday – The bus didn't show up and after 20 – 25 minutes, I reluctantly left the bus stop certain that it would drive up the road just as I was pulling out of my drive way but I never did see it and ended up driving into the city.
Time to get home = 2 hours, 15 minutes
Cost = $31 parking, $6 tolls = $37

Tuesday – The bus showed up right on time and although the website said I could purchase the ticket from the driver it didn't say that I would be charged the regular fee which I was. I sat in the front seat and at the next stop an older (ha! 15 years older than me I think) woman got on the bus and said "oh! You're sitting in my seat. I mean, you're sitting in the seat I normally sit in." The bus was empty but she sat right next to me..... As God as my witness, I will sit in that seat every time I take the bus. Got to the city just fine and walked the 18 blocks to the Flatiron building for training.

That night, I walked back to the Port Authority, looked at the sign, gave the man my ticket (which I'd purchased that morning once I came in to the station) which clearly said Chester and got on the bus. The bus did not go to Chester. It went to Suffren and there it stopped. "Please sir, how do I get home?" He told me exactly what to do and I did exactly that:
NYC bus driver -
Get off this bus and stand right there. (He pointed at the ground very sternly.)
A green bus will come for Sloatsburg. Get on it.
Get off when that driver tells you to.
A bus coming from NYC going to Chester will come. Get on it.

"Please sir, how do I get home?"
Sloatsburg bus driver -
Get off this bus and stand right there (outside a bank, dark and busy street)
Watch for a bus coming from NYC and flag it down or it won't stop.
Ask if they go to Chester. If they do, get on the bus and go home.

And off I get and stand there. Hoping. Hoping he was right. Hoping I don't get kidnapped, killed or sideswiped by a car.

He was right.

The next bus that came by stopped, let some people off and yes, he was going to Chester and would drop me off in Whispering Hills which he did. He dropped me off right in front of my house. Sigh......
Time to get home = 3 hours, 15 minutes
Cost = $40 in bus fares

Wednesday – The bus came. I gave my ticket. I sat down in the front but my friend didn't get on that bus. We're happily driving down the road about halfway to the city when the bus shuts off. All the power just stops while the driver is in the left lane. No lights, no blinkers, no nothing. He pulls over to the shoulder and we wait 30 minutes for a new working bus to appear at which time we're in the full throws of rush hour. We get to the city and I make my way to the subway, down to 23 Street, walk to a café for breakfast and over to my building.
Time to get to my office = 3 hours
Getting home went just swell except our driver had a heavy foot on the
brakes and loved those corners!
Cost = normal

Thursday – I decided to pick up the 6:10 rather than the 6:45 bus and that seems to have worked much much better. The bus filled up quickly so we could by-pass the last two stops and there was no traffic. I finally figured out where the subway was from the Port Authority and got my train downtown, picked up a bagel and waited in the office lobby for someone to let me in the door (no ID yet :-) Wow! It went great.
I can only assume that I will get home at a reasonable hour tonight. Right??

Friday - Who can say.

This experience will only serve to make my work-at-home days sweeter.